dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
You got in a fight last night?
Yeah! Some dude in the bathroom...he was standing there and I notice he's got the same shirt as me on so I'm like...dude you should have called me, we look like idiots...he didn't say anything...so i got pissed and hit him...completely decimated and my hand was all bloody and covered with glass afterward...weird dude, never saw him again that night or since.
Um...Did this guy happen to look almost exactly like you?
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Randomize
