So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
We had to coat check the pizza.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Someone signed my nipple.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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