Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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