my text book just quoted the cookie monster
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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