awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
It was just a squirrel
You act like its normal to see a squirrel in the bar
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
I just want to trick people into going on dates with me so they can bring back to their houses and let me use their wifi.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
