he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
