i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
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