You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
The only thing I've had to eat today was the half eaten sausage biscuit I found on my chest when I woke up this morning.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
The thing about being single is like Sunday morning sex is nice but so is Sunday morning eating Nutella from the jar in your underwear
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
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