Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
