what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I thought it was kinda weird that her ten yearold sister was playing bartender, but hey, the girl makes a damn good drink
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Success! We fucked roommates!
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize
