JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
Hippo gnu deer
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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