I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize