I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
Randomize