I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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