NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
After 12 shots he decided to show us knife tricks. You can figure out how it ended
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
