We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
