Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
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