thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
His parents came home, and now I'm hiding in a closet; awaiting death at dawn.
You are always hiding in a closet though??
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Randomize
