i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I need to calm my uterus...
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
I deserve this hangover.
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