Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
shit I'm tired of wearing other peoples clothes to bed
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
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