Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
You need a sexual gate keeper
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
