He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
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