home. puking in laundry basket.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
