She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Randomize
