Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
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