I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
The first sip always goes straight to my vagina.
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Randomize
