Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
