Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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