So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
then he tried to convert me to islam
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Randomize