and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
Well yes but because of that incident i now salute to truck drivers
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
