he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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