I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
just let her blow you already, it's practically animal cruelty at this point.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
PS if you want to hear something hilarious as my little sister was showing me her engagement ring I open a Snapchat from R and it's literally a dick pic. Very different points in our life
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
