Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
My feet surprised me
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Randomize
