There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
Randomize
