but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Farmville is her only friend.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
Randomize
