Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
He called me from prison intake to wish me luck on my job interview. Somehow that's the most romantic thing that's ever happened to me.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
I'm crossing my legs while pooping. Taking a shit has never looked so proper.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I can no longer play with you. I puked on my feet in the shower. I'm too old for this.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
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