I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
Immaculate conception is definitely the most boring way to conceive a child.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
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