Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
