We're like a lot better than the average bears
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I just found out the guy that lied and blew me off got arrested, his mugshot is online. Life is good.
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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