and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
I'm currently on a bowling date with my girlfriend and her boyfriend. It's pretty fun.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
So it turns out that a Ford Focus does not fit in a Walmart cart return.
Randomize
