i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
Randomize
