Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
my poor anus
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Randomize
