After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
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