do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I have just been informed that my company has ray guns. I WORK FOR ACTUAL BOND VILLAINS. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
