So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
The fact that you think I have a life is so flattering to me.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Randomize
