but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
But I always wanted my obit to read "Died violently in casino orgy," not "Never woke up from rectal surgery."
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
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