Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
if i can run in heels then i can drive
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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