did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
