Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Clusterfucked is a frowned upon word in work related emails
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
he puked in the sink and didnt turn off the water before he passed out on the bathroom floor. its been 2 hrs and we finally noticed that the whole fucking house is flooded. to hell with this birthday party
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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