I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
